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pirate mouse character design assignment

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pirate mouse character design assignment

Hi, I've gotta design a pirate mouse for a character design assignment, and I could use some feedback before I do the front, side, and back views.

http://ribaldyouth.com/krishna/anim/piratemouse.jpg

Please be brutal! I could use the critique.

My roommate tells me that the way the hands are positioned is awkward, like he can't tell what he's doing (it reminds him of Ross banging his wrists together on Friends), and that the body looks too much like Goofy. I don't have much of a problem with either (I think the hand positions communicate his timid nature), but if anyone else agrees, I'll reconsider.

btw if anyone can tell me what character his face keeps reminding me of I'd be grateful... it's been bothering me for days. I thought it was the Duckman characters but I don't think that's it -_-.

Thanks!

This is just me being a nitpicker...thinking of "unity with variety"...is it absolutely necessary to include the iris on the last one? That HAS to be painful looking back like that. One of the things I thought of after the post the other night, is taking it into the more casual world of timidness, keep everything where it is and then just lightly tap the hands together (kept in the same pose though) at the knuckle. So they're still fist-like just as you have them, but hinging at the wrist where they meet, just clack 'em. Also try doing the same thing but the lowest knuckles on the back of the hand, with the space at the elbows and no meeting wrists.

On the whole, little details excluded, I really like the character and would love to see how you move him around.

Suggestion

Not sure when the deadline for your assignment is so I don't know if you can use this or not, but you might want to test some different expressions. I already like what you have so far, and it works great in the timid representation that you have it in now, but you might want to see what kind of range you can get out of it. If you are going to be submitting this in an assignment, try a few excited or angy facial expressions so that you know that the design isn't limiting you.

Keep up the good work and I'm looking forward to seeing more.

KalEl118

scatteredlogical>
agreed on the iris bit, just looking at him doing it makes my eyes hurt. As for the other hand positions you're talking about, I'm not quite sure what you're saying, but the more I act out the pose, the more I want to just put the hands flush against eachother, side by side, so the meet at the wrists and knuckles, which is the idea I get from the first position you described.
Kalel>
thanks, I'll keep that in mind for the next time I'm working on character designs. This is due tomorrow morning so I won't have time to do anything but turn it in as is.

If you're going with that, or how you've understood it, keep everything touching but don't -force- it to touch, and then sort of roll your hands into each other. That creates a space, because the wrists are no longer touching. The elbows, if anything happens at all, are only slightly open - that's where I was going.

I don't know how it is for you, but I can sorta empathize (seeing as how I'm physically built like your character haha) that my shoulders up front and up top sort of arc inward in these poses, like I'm imploding. It might even work to keep the hands like we've been talking about, and trade the elbow closeness for the imploding shoulders thing, and keep the bottom area expanded...the elbows and biceps would still be flush with the body, but more parallel to it....or to where it would be if his back weren't so far into osteoporosis =) Oh btw, I downloaded your Maya file for the flour sack. Very nice! Fluid movements, and I like the flicker back of his corner tassels as if they were hair and he had some sort of bravado...and also the dresser falling back makes me freak out and cringe internally just like if it were real. Like that feeling when a glass is going to break. Your reflexes should be catching it, trying to save it; instead you spent that 1/4 of a second going EEEEEE! and watching it shatter and getting scared or pissed, tense... hehe

Anyhow kudos again, this is a fun and interactive WIP.

I don't think your character reminds me of any particular other one I've seen before but I when in doubt about a character's looks and design I find it helps to start out with the real thing - look at photos of meeces, then look at photos or historical illustrations of pirates, sketch a little, then start interpreting.

scattered, I would say it's rated "Arrrrrrrrrrrrr!" :D

Blahdy blahdy blahdy blahdy blahady...

scattered> thanks

bloo> lol

ha, I just found my professor whose class this assignment is for is a mod here - larry l.

In good hands! (Non-)Strangers in the niiiight, exchanges sketches...

I'll post my critique, for what it's worth, later tonight. My first thought before I read any farther was Duckman. The only other thing it could be as far as what I know is AAAAH! Real Monsters thanks to the ears.

I don't mind the Goofy-ness in full view, but I can see where he's coming from because when it was shrunk in a smaller window it definitely gave off that vibe. Whether or not derivative work is intentional or a great thing is up to you to decide.

In the pants, if you're going to have the crotch of it hang so low, I'd flip the curve on the overlap; I think the physics of the cloth would follow the right leg vertically as much as possible while still retaining the loose leg-to-leg horizontal jump.

As far as the hands go, they read as out-of-synch and I'm willing to bet that's why your friend thinks they're akward. Even with the legs bent you've got enough of a case for a line of action going, and it all pretty much takes place in 3/4 view. However, when you go to draw his hands, you've got them positioned almost in a full frontal, as if to present them to someone. If it's all in the name of timidness, act it out -- you'll see the more he fears the more he'd draw not just the hands but the arms at the elbows too, into his body.

Here's a photo to demonstrate:

In order to replicate your drawing, I actually have to adjust my body to compensate, and take it out of the complete 3/4. However, if it were a unified position, like the photo on the right, there'd be almost no distance and the hands/arms would project right off the body and never deviate. Of course in mine it's a mix of fear and bashful, because in trying to avoid cliche I carelessly didn't close the gap between the elbows, but you get the general idea.

I also revised your drawing to illustrate what I'd go for if I was following your thought process:

The colors are for clarity and nothing more. I changed the curve to be a bit more realistic which nicely echoes the spine, and also repositioned the hands. It's not rendered out like yours, it is tablet work straight in Photoshop and has its own problems like perspective and tangents, but it serves the purpose of what I'm trying to say without spending too long to do it haha

I hope that is somewhat accurate and helps you along the way.

wow, that helps a lot, I wasn't expecting such a detailed response. I'll make the changes and post the finished product
thanks