Dr. Toon: What's it Worth to You?
Some of us are frugal souls who are able to responsibly budget, with one eye on the kids' college fund and the other on a happy retirement. Coupons in hand and a tightly rolled copy of Consumer Reports in pocket, these ants continually put the grasshoppers around them to shame. Still, let us give some props to the grasshoppers, as well those sizzling shoppers whose cash flows become a flood of spending that could swamp old Noah himself. Whether you are among those who save for a rainy day or whether you believe that credit cards exist to be maxed, you have your own spending style. The question is, regardless of how you part with your dough, what should you lavish it on? Dr. Toon, the most sage of financial advisors, has your answer. Whatever you spend, spend it on animation.
What's that you say? Not quite the answer that Merrill Lynch or Charles Schwab might give? What do those hidebound suits know, anyhow? Trust me, there is nothing in life as wonderful or valuable as animation is. This is true whether you have chump change or billions of dollars to spare. After I give you 10 good examples that measure expenditures of roughly equal amounts, I'm sure that you'll agree. When we are done with this month's column, you will know exactly what animation is worth to you. (Note to sticklers: prices are current, approximate and will not be rounded off to the nearest nickel. What do I look like, your accountant?)
Example One: Stay home and cook. The whole family can have fun putting a set together, making the puzzles on the back and laughing at the funny baseball cards imbued with images of classic Warner favorites. The kid will be amused, child obesity will be staved off for one more day and we all know where those burgers, fries and soft drinks are headed within 48 hours. The cards are still flush with fun after the combo meals are simply flushed. Play ball, Bugs!
Advantage: You deserve a (financial) break today. Box of Looney Tune Comic Ball cards.
Fast-food burger combo meals for Mom, Dad and one kid: $15.00
One unopened box of 1991 Looney Tunes Comic Ball cards: $15.00
Example Two: It depends on how you want to spend your evening. If you want to get intoxicated, pack on a bunch of empty calories and stand before the toilet shedding your beer through any number of possible bodily functions, take the Heineies. Maybe you'll get a buck back on the bottle returns, but you'll have nothing else, either. Or, you can watch a magical, mythical tale of love and redemption that represents imagination at its finest. Then you can watch it again, just for the colorful imagery. Then you can watch it again, because you now own it forever. Are you all starting to get the point?
Advantage: Myazaki looks tremendous; no wonder he's number one. Spirited Away DVD.
Example Three: The gasoline does nothing but burn up, waft into the atmosphere and contributes to the Earth's doom through the curse of global warming. Those fossil fuels are frittered into fumes while the world's icecaps melt away and the Middle East continues to destabilize. The smart buy was the vintage Snow White set, an attractive and valuable keepsake that is much more endearing than any gas cap will ever be.
Advantage: You can trust your dough to the guys who sing "Heigh-ho."
1938 Seiberling Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs set.
24-12 oz. bottles of Heineken beer: $19.99
DVD of Hayao Myazaki's Spirited Away (sale price at local Best Buy): $19.99
One-year supply, reg. unleaded gasoline (12,000 miles per year/ $2.30 per gallon): $1,255
1938 Seiberling Vintage Disney Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs set: $1100
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